Communication Problems in Relationships

Communication Problems in Relationships

What causes communication problems in relationships ?

Intimate relationships offer solace, nurturing, support and happiness and fun, but are also sometimes the origin of distress, frustration and deep despair. Normal times of highs and lows in attraction, energy and enthusiasm can place stress on most relationships. However we have limited control over these areas. Many problems come from factors such as job and financial pressures, or aims and desires being different between people. There are some areas in which changes can be made, that can re-energise relationship satisfaction and open the way for renewed growth instead of being locked into communication problems in your relationships

Poor communication creates problems in relationships:
The way people talk (or don’t talk) to one another causes lots of distress and tensions. Examples of poor communication in relationships are when one partner:

• Has a demanding or intrusive communication style and the other partner pulls away or will not communicate in return, thus perpetuating the poor communication in their relationships.
• attempts to manipulate their partner with negativity as in anger and sadness.
• Personally makes accusations to their partner, such as putting them down with hurtful crticisms such as ‘laziness’, instead of explaining that it is the behaviour rather than the person that concerns them.
• doesn't show any concern or empathetic understanding by not physically or emotionally responding to their partner.
  

Developing communication lessens problems in relationships and requires many skills. Some basic skills are:

• Get rid of distractions, like TV or radio sounds, and make a time to talk that is agreeable to both partners.
• Don't interrupt your partner mid sentence or talk over them. If you are uncertain or feel hurt by the conversation, try to summarise what you have heard to see if what you heard was accurate.
• Don't "label" your partner. Keep your attention on their actions not the person. Personalised attacks will not improve the situation, where as speaking about specific instances of behaviour gives opportunities for changes to be made . As well, try to communicate in an encouraging and positive manner, which shows you are supporting rather than putting them down.
• Always discuss the good aspects about your relationship, and don't simply focus on the poor communication in the relationships.

Poor problem solving skills produce poor communication in your relationships. Problem solving skills are absolutely necessary for working out relationship issues, and other problems which affect most relationships, ranging from paying the accounts to organising times which involve you having great times together.

Common reasons for poor problem solving are:

• Failing to see the cause of the problem. You may be concluding your partner’s recent lack of interest means they are losing their love for you, when in reality they could be stressed out their brain through work pressures.
• Having a quick fix solution which missed the mark. You may be thinking that a vacation will be a quick fix a solution, rather than sseing that small changes in your daily life may make all the difference.
• Trying to fix the problem without your partner. Failing to work out solutions together can bring about blame each other when things seem to be falling apart..

Getting problem solving skills right can make a big difference.
Problem solving skills are not always easy to learn or apply particuarly in during tense times filled with emotion. But don't let that stop you!.Get out of the "poor communication in relationships" syndrome is what it is about. Some suggestions:

• Factor down bigger problems into smaller ones and then work on each one individually in some priority. This slices up those big and issues making them less overwhelming and more manageable.
• Look at all possibilities in your options and strategies before selecting a solution. Often the least obvious ones turn out to be the most useful.
• Keep involving your partner as both of you need to experience a sense of shared ownership in what you are doing. Don't forget to ask each other for ideas and views and get regular feedback. If you do this you will get rid of poor communication in your relationships.
• Always concentrate on the positives and keep learning from each experience. Always be aware of what did work and when success is a bit harder see what adjustments you need to make next time.

MIXING MARRIAGE AND MONEY:

5 handy tips to help avoid money communication problems in relationships:

When couples decide to take the step of eternal commitment, they are ready to embrace each other’s outstanding qualities and accept any less-than-ideal traits. However, before walking down the aisle you need to be armed with tactics to handle any woud be communication problems in your relationship. To do this, couples need to discuss how they will be spending their money as husband and wife. As unromantic as it may sound, experts agree that money issues profoundly affect romantic relationships. Too often in relationships, money is an emotionally charged subject that causes sparks to fly. Honest communication and the below tips from the experts can keep your relationship from becoming another statistic caused by unecessary communication problems in your relationships.

• Communicate about your current situation. Tell your spouse about any debt or credit problems that you may bring to the relationship. While this may be a hard thing to do, being honest now may prevent communication problems in your relationships down the road.
• Discuss financial priorities. Discuss how you’d like to spend your money in the future. Think out the large and necessary costs such as a new house and education savings for college. Also important to discuss is the cost of recurrent leisure activities such as weekend entertainment and hobbies, as well as vacations. Such discussion will minimise communication problems in your relationships.
• Discuss financial goals. Write out your individual short-term, mid-term and long-term financial goals. Then, share the goals with your partner and discuss their similarities and differences. Remember that if you and your partner are headed in different directions, neither one of you will get there and the communication problems in your relationships will be immense.
• Plan to share financial responsibility. Both partners in a relationship must be aware of the overall financial situation. Plan monthly meetings to discuss your finances and keep files regarding investments, accounts and insurance organized and accessible. Make all significant financial decisions togetherto help avoid unecessary communication problems in your relationships.
• Understand your individual rights and responsibilities. State laws vary quite a bit regarding ownership of income and responsibility for debt. Learning about your individual privileges and liabilities will only help to minimise communication problems in your relationships and could provide future financial security in a time of need.

The most important money move you might make for your relationship is to embrace your differences.

Understand that you cannot change feelings created by a lifetime of experience.

Rather, try to cultivate the positive aspects of each of your styles. There is no one ‘right’ way to handle your finances. A marriage of your money styles may be the perfect solution.